Autism

I heard ppl who have autism are socially disfuntional and can’t have normal friendships and relationships. I have a friend who little did I know had autism cuz I didn’t know why he acted like such a jerk cuz he had a competitive lying problem that a lot of ppl hated about him. And I thought he was really strange and a unusual person. How bad is autism?

Autism varies from person to person. Your friend is probably trying to figure out how to fit in. Yes people on the Autism spectrum have a hard time understanding social settings and cues. The most important thing to know is that he wants to be normal.

I have two children on the spectrum. My son, age 11, will do anything to keep a friend. He watches what everyone does and then tries to mimic them. If he notices that doing something cool gets people positive attention then he will do that too regardless if it is dangerous or means lying. Example: If my son heard a group of boys talking about how good they were at skateboarding, he would say he is a good skateboarder too. He isn’t focusing on the topic as much as wanting to be included in the conversation which would make him a ‘normal’ boy. He doesn’t understand that he can ask questions and fit in that way or that he can segway into a topic that he is good in. He sees things black and white. They are talking about skateboarding so I need to tell them I am good at it… It may not make sense, but it is how some children on the spectrum’s minds work.

Notice on how I said some. Each person is unique. In your friends case he may just have a problem with lying. In all probability he just wants to be friends. You asking this question tells me that you are a good friend. Most people would just walk away from someone like that, or call them names. Being honest with him lets him know that he can be honest with you.

I suggest you talk to him about what is going on. Try not to be confrontational about it, because people on the spectrum get nervous and have a hard time dealing with things then. If you can make a joke about it or do it with a light heart you will have a better chance of reaching him. Another thing that might help is knowing that Autistic people tend to make friends for life. They are the most loyal and kind people in the world once you have their friendship. Sometimes it is a hard road to get there, but the rewards are tremendous. Can you imagine having a friend who would defend you to the death? Someone who would never think of dating your girl or even your ex! That is how I would classify these guys.

I hope I have helped!

Kara

My sister is very interested in supporting Autism through the internet. How would she come to do this?

She would like to do it through facebook. Is there a way to start your own Autism website?

Suggestions?
-Dustin

Contact a legitimate autism support group and get together with them. They not only have good ideas and appreciate efforts of others, they have the tax-deductible status from IRS so donors are more likely to contribute.